Everyone does NOT own a BlackBURY!

It’s happened to me before and each time the frustration grows a little bit more but it subsides and my normally generous nature gets the better of my writing anything down that I would someday possibly regret. But today I was pushed over the edge by someone and have to simply write about it to (mostly) just get it out there and see if there is any resonance with others about this feeling or if I have REALLY finally slipped below the baseline of what is “generally accepted practice” in our business society. Do you ever have the feeling that sometimes – maybe JUST SOMEtimes – people use technology as an excuse to look better socially than they should?

I am talking about that e-mail that is sent MOMENTS before you are set to enter a meeting or walk in the door of your next appointment (after a 30 minute drive through rush hour traffic) as if just sending it absolves the sender of any responsibility for having inconvenienced you. This time it was a meeting at someone’s office. The kind-faced gentle and VERY apologetic young lady greeted me at the door (I really got the impression that this was NOT her favorite part of the job but that she had become used to doing it because she’s done it so many times before) with “I’m so sorry but we tried to reach you by e-mail… Oh you DIDN’T get the note? Well my boss has been unavoidably delayed in WASHINGTON DC and will not be able to make your appointment today.” Now I’m in Mississauga (near Toronto CANADA!!!) as is his office. The flight from Washington DC is at least an hour long. Since it’s an INTERNATIONAL flight from a sensitive area I would suppose that he needed to get to the airport at least 90 minutes ahead of time. If he’d been too lazy to check his flight before leaving from his hotel he’d STILL have known something was not going to happen ABOUT 90 minutes BEFORE the flight left. Then there is the hour of flying time and the inevitable 45 minutes of delays (those of you who travel through Pearson on Air Canada know what I am talking about) before the flight can disgorge its tired passengers. Then there would be the 15 minutes or so cab ride to the office. All in all I figure 90+60+45+15=THREE AND A HALF HOURS before our meeting was the LATEST he could have known. Now on a good day the office is about 20 minutes away from mine. It took me 30 today and I checked my own e-mail before I left. Have they already invented “Beam me up Scotty”? What supersonic travel machine was EVER going to put him in his office seat in time for our meeting earlier? So the only conclusion I can reach is that the last minute note is only a lame way of saying “You know what? I don’t value you AT ALL!” That is certainly the way I took the “brush off”. In all fairness, I’ve been trying to reach out to this individual FOUR times already and each time there is something or the other that SUDDENLY comes up at the last minute. Things do happen in this crazy world we all live in and the first three times I was ready to give him the benefit of the doubt. The truth of it is we all meet people we don’t see a “connection” with. I usually try to man enough to say that directly and give the other person a chance to show me why I am (or may be) wrong. It’s the least we can do for one another.

When we treat people in a way that says “I don’t value you” we offend them. Why not simply say “I don’t think we have any business to discuss so I am not going to be able to make an appointment right now”. It’s because we all function on a bit of uncertainty. We don’t KNOW that we don’t have any business to discuss. The problem is that it is a round SMALL world that is getting ever-smaller. I happen to know people who INVESTED in the company run by this individual and who are genuinely value-driven people. They would be APPALLED by this “KISS up, SPIT down” attitude. We need to treat all people with respect. One never knows where that will lead. It MAY even be good business practice!

"Points of Light" in this modern world?

I am writing today after a long break in this activity because I have a need to express some thoughts. Maybe they are helpful to some of those who read this blog but that advantage, major as it may be to you, is only incidental THIS TIME to me. Please forgive me for this.

It seems that all around me BIG things are happening - family is doing very well, daughter just graduated from Medicine, she's getting married this weekend, some of my adopted professional "children" (those of you who know me know that I adopt a small band of people early in their careers and help them in some catalytic way and then watch as they set their part of the world on FIRE with successes) have found new GREAT jobs and are happy, one just had a baby, the business is thriving even in these so-called tough times and all is well etc etc etc.

And yet through all of that there is an occassional DEEP dark cloud that overpowers me and shakes my belief in this world to the core. You see my good friend Larry Falls is suffering from late stage pancreatic cancer. I almost cannot bear to see someone of his quality and personal and professional stature have to suffer the indignity that this illness brings on its vistims. I know that some of you have read the website that describes the concept of the Real Human Being ( http://www.realhumanbeing.org/index.php/about-rhb ) where my friend Dave Howlett describes a story I once told him and has quite successfully converted that story into a way for people to think and interact with one another. Well, I feel that Larry Falls is the ULTIMATE REAL HUMAN BEING. He's compassionate, generous of spirit and continuously sees only the GOOD in others. So it is PARTICULARLY painful for me to see this modern-day hero have to suffer like this.

Yesterday, a ray of sunshine shone into that gloom and I was somehow reassured about my fellow man. It turns out that news of Larry's situation spread far and wide and SOMEONE took it upon himself (thanks Grant) to make a web site to honor Larry Falls ( www.everybodyoveslarryfalls.com ). The news is spreading even faster and farther now and the posts are absolutely HEARTWARMING. You really SHOULD try to get to know Larry while there is still time or at least see for yourself what the acclaim for a REAL HUMAN BEING looks like through the posts. Its great to know that good people ARE recognized by all of us and that there IS room for Points-of-Light like this one in this universe yet. When one touches YOUR life next time remember that this modern day approach is a way to give people an opportunity to see what the world thinks of them while they are still on it and it helps those whose lives they have touched to "find" one another and to carry on a tradition. Thanks Larry for being a mentor to me!! I hope that you become the first person to CONQUER this horrible disease and that you get the miracle you so RICHLY deserve.