Points of Light

OK! So maybe it is the copious amounts of “dairy-free eggnog” (just start with 12 parts of rum... and enjoy!) or maybe it is the Festive Season. I don't know what to blame this one on but most people who know me know that I give advice only VERY rarely and then only if somehow coerced into doing it. So this is maybe a one-time break with tradition. Think of it not so much as advice per se but rather the sharing of a revelation that I had over the Holidays.

Most of our universe is covered in darkness. The recent “dark matter” discoveries seem to substantiate that thought. Look up at the night sky sometime. The universe is mostly dark emptiness. But the remarkable thing about all of this darkness is that when we look up at the night sky it is NOT the darkness we see. It is the little points of light. They give us an “orientation”. They help us see more clearly. They give us hope. They confer a sense of “eternity”. How many times have we heard the sentiment that we are probably NOT alone in the universe? Never has the answer been more “obvious” to me than looking up at the night sky. Seeing all those stars out there shining their little hearts out into the darkness (almost literally) gives me the courage to say that it is almost bordering on probabilistically ridiculous to think that we are the ONLY life forms out there in the universe. … And this gives me hope!

The point is that the stars don't know and don't care that they give me hope. But their shining just DOES. We have that choice in our lives. To be points of light or to simply see the “darkness”. There is much of it around us (we may feel that this is particularly true these days but this has been true throughout the ages) and we can easily see nothing but the loneliness of that darkness in our lives. We can take social “averages” and tell ourselves that we are “bright enough” or that “others are darker than us” etc. and so give ourselves the excuse to sink to the level of gray empty darkness that surrounds us and swallows us whole. But if we look at the history books, they are not filled with the vast “emptiness” of “average humanity” They are filled with the “heros”, the “points of light that did something because it was the RIGHT THING TO DO.

The alternative is to think of ourselves as the social equivalent of the stars in the night sky and to do our best to shine without expecting anything to happen as a direct consequence in our lifetime. To seek out the other “points of light” in the darkness and to take comfort in their presence throughout history. To be a part of hope and faith in other human beings in future generations whom we may not yet know. This is a wholesome and positive way to live and by doing this in our own lives and seeking to synergize with others who do so in their own ways in their own lives (think of our “shining” as one wavelength in what will be a whole SPECTRUM through the combination with other “wavelengths”) we can hopefully create a brightness that outshines the darkness and brings hope and faith to countless generations.

There is a need in this world today I believe for such a grass roots “Points-of-Light” movement. We cannot change the way the universe is but through it we can just make the light more memorable than the dark.

Are you with me on this one? Let me know.

Free Software can be SO good

I recently had trouble opening files that people sent to me which they had been made with the most recent version of Microsoft's famous Office suite of software (you know, the ones with the docx, pptx, etc endings). Of course, I was a bit dismayed that I would have to now spend some more hard-earned cash just to stay up with the moving times in the word processing software (I still think Wordstar was one of the best for the buck! YES I'm that old!!). A friend of mine told me about Sun Microsystem's Open Office suite of software and so I went out and downloaded it thinking "what difference could it make? If it doesn't work I can always just uninstall it and go out and spend my money." I am in AWE that a suite so good and apparently complete can be absolutely FREE! There IS a God!! I am happily using it for the time being and I would recommend ANYONE to try it out. The added advantage is that it opens a wide variety of file types and saves data in a wide variety of formats too. The spreadsheet part for example opens old Excel files absolutely without problems. and the ones I made in this software and saved to the old xls format opened in my old copy of Office PERFECTLY.

It started me thinking how the writers of this software make money and FOR SURE they didn't make as much as Office has made it's parent company. But do we all NEED to get filthy rich? Can we not just enjoy being happy and a LITTLE rich? OpenOffice.org you have helped me believe in people again!

Attitude is EVERYTHING

Today I was talking to a former colleague and she told me a story that really encapsulated the very essence of the old adage that is the headline of this blog. The words were prominently displayed in 5 foot tall letters over the entrance to a school my daughter went to. "ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING".

The Neuro-biologists now have actual proof (so they say anyway) that the brain "filters" most of what the senses deliver to it and actively collects "evidence" in support of the biases we hold. What this means is that if we think the world is an awful place where gloom and doom preside over everything else then we will subconsciously collect information from our daily lives that more supports this idea than the evidence that refutes it REGARDLESS of the ACTUAL preponderance of the evidence one way or another. This will lead to a spiral effect that can only lead to one conclusion. (Maybe that's why they call science a DISCIPLINE - because you have to discipline yourself NOT to do that and to allow yourself to be led by the evidence only)

My former colleague told me a story today of her aunt (who has this OVERWHELMING attitude that the world is essentially a good, benign and "lucky" place for her) who visited New York City. During her visit she was parked somewhere and someone smashed her windshield and stole something from her car. She reported it to the police and in the course of the report the police discovered that she was not insured. She called the insurance company to find that although she had paid her renewal fee THEY had failed to cash her cheque and so technically she was not insured. Of course, when they found out the circumstances of her call they refused to insure her ANYWAY.

Her attitude? "How luck am I!!! This could have been an accident where some serious damage was done and then I would be liable for so much more." Her "lucky streak" was further confirmed in her mind when she returned home to Canada and shopped around and found similar insurance that was EVEN CHEAPER than she would have paid before.

Life is what we make it. We have to play the cards we are dealt so why not START with the attitude that they are the luckiest ones and try to find the evidence that supports that?

Everyone does NOT own a BlackBURY!

It’s happened to me before and each time the frustration grows a little bit more but it subsides and my normally generous nature gets the better of my writing anything down that I would someday possibly regret. But today I was pushed over the edge by someone and have to simply write about it to (mostly) just get it out there and see if there is any resonance with others about this feeling or if I have REALLY finally slipped below the baseline of what is “generally accepted practice” in our business society. Do you ever have the feeling that sometimes – maybe JUST SOMEtimes – people use technology as an excuse to look better socially than they should?

I am talking about that e-mail that is sent MOMENTS before you are set to enter a meeting or walk in the door of your next appointment (after a 30 minute drive through rush hour traffic) as if just sending it absolves the sender of any responsibility for having inconvenienced you. This time it was a meeting at someone’s office. The kind-faced gentle and VERY apologetic young lady greeted me at the door (I really got the impression that this was NOT her favorite part of the job but that she had become used to doing it because she’s done it so many times before) with “I’m so sorry but we tried to reach you by e-mail… Oh you DIDN’T get the note? Well my boss has been unavoidably delayed in WASHINGTON DC and will not be able to make your appointment today.” Now I’m in Mississauga (near Toronto CANADA!!!) as is his office. The flight from Washington DC is at least an hour long. Since it’s an INTERNATIONAL flight from a sensitive area I would suppose that he needed to get to the airport at least 90 minutes ahead of time. If he’d been too lazy to check his flight before leaving from his hotel he’d STILL have known something was not going to happen ABOUT 90 minutes BEFORE the flight left. Then there is the hour of flying time and the inevitable 45 minutes of delays (those of you who travel through Pearson on Air Canada know what I am talking about) before the flight can disgorge its tired passengers. Then there would be the 15 minutes or so cab ride to the office. All in all I figure 90+60+45+15=THREE AND A HALF HOURS before our meeting was the LATEST he could have known. Now on a good day the office is about 20 minutes away from mine. It took me 30 today and I checked my own e-mail before I left. Have they already invented “Beam me up Scotty”? What supersonic travel machine was EVER going to put him in his office seat in time for our meeting earlier? So the only conclusion I can reach is that the last minute note is only a lame way of saying “You know what? I don’t value you AT ALL!” That is certainly the way I took the “brush off”. In all fairness, I’ve been trying to reach out to this individual FOUR times already and each time there is something or the other that SUDDENLY comes up at the last minute. Things do happen in this crazy world we all live in and the first three times I was ready to give him the benefit of the doubt. The truth of it is we all meet people we don’t see a “connection” with. I usually try to man enough to say that directly and give the other person a chance to show me why I am (or may be) wrong. It’s the least we can do for one another.

When we treat people in a way that says “I don’t value you” we offend them. Why not simply say “I don’t think we have any business to discuss so I am not going to be able to make an appointment right now”. It’s because we all function on a bit of uncertainty. We don’t KNOW that we don’t have any business to discuss. The problem is that it is a round SMALL world that is getting ever-smaller. I happen to know people who INVESTED in the company run by this individual and who are genuinely value-driven people. They would be APPALLED by this “KISS up, SPIT down” attitude. We need to treat all people with respect. One never knows where that will lead. It MAY even be good business practice!

"Points of Light" in this modern world?

I am writing today after a long break in this activity because I have a need to express some thoughts. Maybe they are helpful to some of those who read this blog but that advantage, major as it may be to you, is only incidental THIS TIME to me. Please forgive me for this.

It seems that all around me BIG things are happening - family is doing very well, daughter just graduated from Medicine, she's getting married this weekend, some of my adopted professional "children" (those of you who know me know that I adopt a small band of people early in their careers and help them in some catalytic way and then watch as they set their part of the world on FIRE with successes) have found new GREAT jobs and are happy, one just had a baby, the business is thriving even in these so-called tough times and all is well etc etc etc.

And yet through all of that there is an occassional DEEP dark cloud that overpowers me and shakes my belief in this world to the core. You see my good friend Larry Falls is suffering from late stage pancreatic cancer. I almost cannot bear to see someone of his quality and personal and professional stature have to suffer the indignity that this illness brings on its vistims. I know that some of you have read the website that describes the concept of the Real Human Being ( http://www.realhumanbeing.org/index.php/about-rhb ) where my friend Dave Howlett describes a story I once told him and has quite successfully converted that story into a way for people to think and interact with one another. Well, I feel that Larry Falls is the ULTIMATE REAL HUMAN BEING. He's compassionate, generous of spirit and continuously sees only the GOOD in others. So it is PARTICULARLY painful for me to see this modern-day hero have to suffer like this.

Yesterday, a ray of sunshine shone into that gloom and I was somehow reassured about my fellow man. It turns out that news of Larry's situation spread far and wide and SOMEONE took it upon himself (thanks Grant) to make a web site to honor Larry Falls ( www.everybodyoveslarryfalls.com ). The news is spreading even faster and farther now and the posts are absolutely HEARTWARMING. You really SHOULD try to get to know Larry while there is still time or at least see for yourself what the acclaim for a REAL HUMAN BEING looks like through the posts. Its great to know that good people ARE recognized by all of us and that there IS room for Points-of-Light like this one in this universe yet. When one touches YOUR life next time remember that this modern day approach is a way to give people an opportunity to see what the world thinks of them while they are still on it and it helps those whose lives they have touched to "find" one another and to carry on a tradition. Thanks Larry for being a mentor to me!! I hope that you become the first person to CONQUER this horrible disease and that you get the miracle you so RICHLY deserve.

Gossip-The social weapon Friends- The antidote

Scientific American today posted an interesting article which appeared in my Google Reader (for those of you who don’t KNOW about Google Reader you REALLY should look into it… and NO I’m not paid by Google.). Here’s the connection to that article

http://www.sciam.com/blog/60-second-science/post.cfm?id=pssst-gossip-hurts--but-friends-can-2009-04-09

The main thesis in this short note was that Gossip hurts (A somewhat OBVIOUS fact) but that friends are the antidote to this weapon of society. Having been the victim of bad rumors and innuendo behind my back I am ACUTELY aware of how dangerous and sinister the effects of gossip can be. Some time ago a person I had known for over a DECADE at that time and whom I considered a personal friend used a workplace situation he had become a victim of to turn the tables and make me an unsuspecting victim of that very same situation. The tragedy; I had actually worked HARD behind the scenes to help him by standing up for him and speaking out against the conclusions that were being spread about him. His utterly false, backstabbing gossip, which he spread far and wide, actually had a devastating effect on my career. I am not alone. Today we know for a fact that adolescents use gossip to cement cliques which can be used by some to force others into horrible acts (including murder). Now we often hear that the “cream always rises to the top” and that “adversity makes one strong” etc. but the net effects of false gossip can be the same as an assault with a weapon on someone. If that attack is strong enough and well enough planned, it can have a crippling effect on one’s future. Does this mean that gossip is ITSELF evil? I’d rather believe that all powerful instruments in our civilization have the capacity to do as much GOOD as they can do evil in the wrong hands. The skill is in using the tool in the right way.

There is need in my opinion to harness the social power that can be exerted in gossip. What if we all made a decision to stand up and say what we believe to be correct of our friends when we hear others (even larger groups of others and even powerful groups of others) saying things about our friends that would diminish them in the eyes of the society that they want to be a part of. It’s risky but don’t we OWE it to our friends to do them this favor? People’s reputations are made by people talking about them when they are not there to defend themselves. Well chosen gatherings can make it possible to spread lies about anyone (even Mother Teressa was not exempt) and to make them stick and propagate by hearsay and gossip. If we make a decision to say good things about people, that too can stick and propagate through gossip. Wouldn’t it be a much better world if we could rely on our friends to (a) quash false rumors about us and (b) propagate GOOD stories about us when we were not there? Who knew it could be so simple to make this a much better society for all of us to live in?

Dubai, Mumbai, Shanghai,…or Bye Bye.

A week ago I was in Vancouver and visited with my good friend Paul. Paul runs a successful business connecting Asia with Canada. As we enjoyed a delightful dinner at a really super restaurant in the downtown area the conversation inevitably turned to the financial downturn we are all experiencing these days and I asked him “How is it in Asia?” His comments were distinctly optimistic compared to the doom and gloom we hear everyday on this side of the Pacific. So I asked him why this might be the case. His answer REALLY struck a chord with me. He said “Back East they have a phrase these days…” you guessed it! …”Dubai, Mumbai, Shanghai … or Bye Bye” The financial power structure is REALLY moving away from North America and those of us who choose to look at the world STILL only through North American glasses (defining all of reality ONLY as NA centric) do so at our own peril.

It strikes me that just as the book that all of us in the “hippy generation” grew up on - I’m OK you’re OK” – shows, there are three phases in the development of anyone’s personality (I’m NOT OK you’re OK, I’m OK you’re NOT OK, I’m OK you’re OK) so also there are the SAME three phases in the development of North America as a persona in the global village. Certainly Canada is still in late phase ONE but the US may be in late phase TWO. In order to really thrive we need to all come to Phase THREE. We need to look for the STRENGTHS in each of our trading partners and ask what we can do with them not how we can develop the SAME strengths so that we can out compete them. Then we need to understand what the rest of the world perceives as OUR strengths and make ourselves excel at THOSE things – to REALLY become world LEADERS in those strengths - and attempt to recover real and sustainable value from them. The old order would be wrapped up in having sufficient amounts of all of the required strengths to create and sustain a COMPLETE human ecosystem in one country. This is OLD WORLD thinking in my opinion. It is no less parochial and no more sustainable than the same attitude in each province or each main city. We are a SINGLE entity – the world! We need to think of life in this way to survive the emerging new order of things.

Busting with all of these rather revolutionary thoughts (at least for me) I attended the annual Roger Martin event. He’s the Dean of the Rotman School of Business in Toronto and the head of the Institute for Competitiveness and Prosperity – to most of us fans he’s simply referred to as Dean Martin! I heard one speaker after another say how great and world-renowned our research in Canada in SEVERAL sectors is. Then they all went on to say (in one way or another) that we need to MATCH the spending on TECHNOLOGICAL innovation with spending on MANAGERIAL innovation (for the cynics this was sort-of self-serving for the head of a BUSINESS school but I was not amongst them) and I couldn’t help thinking ”Do we REALLY need that in Canada?” I could not help thinking that this was only true if we wanted to build the entire ecosystem WITHIN Canada’s borders only. What if we thought GLOBALLY for a moment? What if we contributed what the world CLEARLY identifies as our strength – TECHNICAL innovation? This would only work for Canada if we could recover enough ROI from the licensing of those technologies to ANYONE worldwide who could build them into successful products and profitable companies. What if we left that to those with indigenous VCs (REAL VCs not disguised bankers) and innovative managers? We hear a LOT these days about starting companies from the FIRST DAY with a global view of the markets. What if we take that one step further and start a company from the MANAGEMENT point of view by thinking globally too? Would such a company that seeks to draw what it needs (technologically AND managerially) from wherever in the world where it is STRENGTH actually have an edge? Would it make impossible demands on the cultures of the participants? Would travel become an unsustainable burden? Do we HAVE to develop all of the strengths that we need in EVERY country that aspires to succeed? It strikes me that the better way to reach Phase THREE for all of us is to acknowledge and demand the strengths from each country that they already have and create truly GLOBAL enterprises that could be housed anywhere in the world but which have multinational stakeholders so that EVERY participating nation gains from its success. This would be a world worth living in as long as we can TRULY work out an equitable share for each contributor NOT based on the dollar value of what they contribute but based on the added value that they CONTRIBUTE through their own special skills and expertise. As always your comments would be welcomed.

The "Join my network" disease

Has anyone noticed the recent upswing in requests to join someone's network on Linkedin or Facebook or is it that I suddenly have friends in places where I didn't even know there were places before? I have one contact who, together with his wife may account for about 10 to 20 announcements of new linkages made PER DAY!(sustained for the last 6 months or more) I know, I should simply turn off the RSS feed on my site if I don't want to get all of these tidbits. But ... in the good old days it was actually FUN to see who is connecting with whom. If it were still a serious effort to connect with people and do something with that connection (such as even update poeple about your life from time to time) it might be worthwhile. I know of a group who have simply made it a game to see who can "reach" the most people through this tool. It is really a bit of a shame and actually undermines the value of the tool. The original idea was to be able to check for common friends etc. when meeting someone new. I think that with 2400 in the list of this couple and climbing on a daily basis this could become a bit of a farce.

Now don't get me wrong, I am always flattered that someone asks to have me join their particular "exclusive" little network. But when you see that you are simply a part of a number counting game it could have the opposite effect. I think it all boils down to the economy right now and how that affects all of our self confidence and how THAT in turn can lead one to want to have a large "network" of "friends", but folks; there is SIMPLY NO EASY WAY TO MASS PRODUCE A REAL NETWORK. It is (as I have mentioned before) like planting a fruit tree when one is hungry and looking to eat the fruits before one starves.

I recall once when I had lost a job and someone decent tried to help me. Let's just call him John ... because his real name WAS John :). After he had helped me through the worst part of the initial loss and shock, John said to me "I want you to update me with your progress each month so that I can offer REAL help whenever I see the opportunity." I started writing to John each month summarizing my progress and emphasizing the POSITIVE things that had happened that month. Soon it became a daily goal to find something positive that I could put down on the note to John. Sometimes it was nothing more that the weather being exceptionally suitable for job hunting etc. But always there was something. The thoughts and observations often sparked some suggestions and encouragement and soon that changed my whole disposition. When I landed my next job, one day I was chatting with my new boss (with whome I have developed a lasting friendship over the years) and he mentioned that the REASON he had hired me was that he'd been struck by my incredible optimism even though I'd been on the job hunt for asome time at that point. It is possible that John actually DID help me find my next job after all! As time went on I encountered others who helpedme and seemed GENUINELY interested in participating in my life's journey. The "John list" has grown over the years and I now send out the same monthly note (no more that a few lines NOT like a Christmas letter!) to 56 people. THIS is my network. Luckily for me I have never had the need to tap into this network to get a job but I am sure that if I needed the encouragement and REAL help it would be THIS group who would give it and not anyone else. I would encourage those now engaged in the time-consuming task of simply increasing their contact network to spend the same time REALLY getting to know a small part of that group. THIS is the REAL network that will grow like a tree and shade you when you are scorched, feed you when you are hungry, and cover you in the storm. Who knew that simply old fashioned ideas may STILL be useful. Your thoughts and comments are (as always) most welcome.