Everyone does NOT own a BlackBURY!

It’s happened to me before and each time the frustration grows a little bit more but it subsides and my normally generous nature gets the better of my writing anything down that I would someday possibly regret. But today I was pushed over the edge by someone and have to simply write about it to (mostly) just get it out there and see if there is any resonance with others about this feeling or if I have REALLY finally slipped below the baseline of what is “generally accepted practice” in our business society. Do you ever have the feeling that sometimes – maybe JUST SOMEtimes – people use technology as an excuse to look better socially than they should?

I am talking about that e-mail that is sent MOMENTS before you are set to enter a meeting or walk in the door of your next appointment (after a 30 minute drive through rush hour traffic) as if just sending it absolves the sender of any responsibility for having inconvenienced you. This time it was a meeting at someone’s office. The kind-faced gentle and VERY apologetic young lady greeted me at the door (I really got the impression that this was NOT her favorite part of the job but that she had become used to doing it because she’s done it so many times before) with “I’m so sorry but we tried to reach you by e-mail… Oh you DIDN’T get the note? Well my boss has been unavoidably delayed in WASHINGTON DC and will not be able to make your appointment today.” Now I’m in Mississauga (near Toronto CANADA!!!) as is his office. The flight from Washington DC is at least an hour long. Since it’s an INTERNATIONAL flight from a sensitive area I would suppose that he needed to get to the airport at least 90 minutes ahead of time. If he’d been too lazy to check his flight before leaving from his hotel he’d STILL have known something was not going to happen ABOUT 90 minutes BEFORE the flight left. Then there is the hour of flying time and the inevitable 45 minutes of delays (those of you who travel through Pearson on Air Canada know what I am talking about) before the flight can disgorge its tired passengers. Then there would be the 15 minutes or so cab ride to the office. All in all I figure 90+60+45+15=THREE AND A HALF HOURS before our meeting was the LATEST he could have known. Now on a good day the office is about 20 minutes away from mine. It took me 30 today and I checked my own e-mail before I left. Have they already invented “Beam me up Scotty”? What supersonic travel machine was EVER going to put him in his office seat in time for our meeting earlier? So the only conclusion I can reach is that the last minute note is only a lame way of saying “You know what? I don’t value you AT ALL!” That is certainly the way I took the “brush off”. In all fairness, I’ve been trying to reach out to this individual FOUR times already and each time there is something or the other that SUDDENLY comes up at the last minute. Things do happen in this crazy world we all live in and the first three times I was ready to give him the benefit of the doubt. The truth of it is we all meet people we don’t see a “connection” with. I usually try to man enough to say that directly and give the other person a chance to show me why I am (or may be) wrong. It’s the least we can do for one another.

When we treat people in a way that says “I don’t value you” we offend them. Why not simply say “I don’t think we have any business to discuss so I am not going to be able to make an appointment right now”. It’s because we all function on a bit of uncertainty. We don’t KNOW that we don’t have any business to discuss. The problem is that it is a round SMALL world that is getting ever-smaller. I happen to know people who INVESTED in the company run by this individual and who are genuinely value-driven people. They would be APPALLED by this “KISS up, SPIT down” attitude. We need to treat all people with respect. One never knows where that will lead. It MAY even be good business practice!